|"Position the habitat of your hamster somewhere light and airy,
away from drafts, heaters, direct sunlight and other pets.
Never put it on or near a television, radio or hi-fi or a fridge."
|8/7/05 - Day 36
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>> Howie is Head of Household - James & Sarah are nominated - James won veto <<
America's Choice tie-dye campaign
Arts & crafts day again, so soon
This time they're tie-dying t-shirts
Between fiesta night, piñatas and all this, somebody spent a wad at Michael's
Let's hope the next important comp isn't a bendy-over endurance - backs could be sore
Jennifer's in charge, she mixes up another batch.. Rachel supervises, it's unclear whether she approves or not.. (ok ok it's very clear but I'm trying to be nicer)
Jennifer then reminds Howie she's still there and with bikini'd boobies - he's going to nominate someone else tomorrow, after all.. Ivette's in a good mood again today
James & Sarah's self-banishment keeps them in the pimp room moping, arguing, crying, and occasionally making out.. they come out once in awhile to forage but they don't join the mandatory tie-dye party
Tie-dye round 1 ends and bikini hour begins.. in some cases, bikini tying/untying hour
"Just pawn me"
It doesn't seem like a big deal at the time
Apparently April had agreed to go up against Sarah in a guaranteed 6-1 ticket home for James' future ex-girlfriend, but April's having second thoughts
Ivette makes an offer and that seems to be that - but it sets off what will be (or should be, anyway) the meat of Tuesday's show
Ivette: Just pawn me.. I'm ok with it
Ivette: It's better than putting up someone who can't deal with it
Ivette: She's already got the cigarettes thing to deal with
Howie: Ok so I'll just say 'I pawn you'
They check out their tie-dye results - Jennifer's thrilled with hers - she & her boobies fly it around the yard like a kite, squealing "I love it! I love it!"
The backyard is a colorful tie-dye minefield and everyone else is pleased too
Next thing you know, a concerned Maggie is listening to a towelled 'n turbanned April crying next to her empty crumpled Marlboro carton.. naturally Jennifer's there too
April: I'm not worried about going up, that's not why I'm crying
April: I'm crying cuz I told her (Ivette) if I go up James will be talking shit about me all week and she said that just means I don't believe I have the support of my team
Jennifer: You know what will make you happy? Go look at your tie dye shirt!
April: I'm not sad.. people think just cuz you're crying you have to be sad
April & Jennifer move to the bathroom where they stop innocent bystanders going about their business and tell it again, slightly revised
April (to Beau): It's just the cigarettes, not the block, and now everyone's blowing it all out of proportion and it makes me look bad
Jennifer: Maggie just said you were freaking out
April: I wasn't freaking out
April: When James talks shit about me she (Maggie) just listens, she doesn't stick up for me.. do you think she sees how she is?
I think somewhere in here Ivette told someone (Maggie maybe? my notes are sketchy) that's not how it happened at all and describes it like she told Howie above
I really like the far-right pic above.. I call it 'Tragic April'
They take it out to the backyard where it's Janelle's turn for the new improved version
April: Hey the reason I was crying is the cigarettes - you know I'm a smoker, right?
Janelle: You really are?
April: Eight years
April: It's NOT cuz I'm afraid of being a pawn ok?
Jennifer: It's 90% the smoking but she's also on PB&J, she's also ready to start her period and let's face it, even being a pawn is a little scary
April: You don't even have any control in this house, so it kinda.. <pause>.. sucks
Round 2 begins with paint & markers.. Beau takes scissors to his.. April remains tragic
April (to Howie): It's about the smokes - why don't people just ask me?
They've seen the America's Choice evictees' pleas that aired Thursday and it gradually becomes clear that the shirts are dedicated to them.. James & Sarah finally get chased out to start round 1 - they do it like they did the piñatas, isolated and mostly silent
Gradually messages form.. Janelle starts making a two-sided Kaysar/Michael shirt, and is called to Diary.. when she returns she makes separate Kaysar and Michael shirts
It's unclear how the tie-dye message shirts will work - they talk about wearing them the next few days, but Janelle was obviously told to make separate shirts for each guy so I'm thinking they'll figure into a comp of some sort.. maybe CBS will try to clear up the voting scandal by claiming a 3-way tie and the guys will have to guess who made which shirt and the best guesser walks back in
In the pimp room they're back to under-shirt massages and tragic poses, but outside it's a flurry of sweatshop labor and sloganing
WHAT UP KAYSAR - VOTE 4 ERIC LVFD - AMERICA BRING KAYSAR BACK - MICHAEL DESERVES A SECOND CHANCE - ERIC DUTY HONOR INTEGRITY TRUST
You get the idea.. fortunately Howie's back to his old self and helps brainstorm.. BB5 fans get a happy reminder of june-bug flying lessons, but these guys don't get it
Howie: Let's see, America's Choice.. lock the door America, we don't need anymore help, wait no no no.. no vacancy
Howie: Send Ashlea back she had a great rack.. oh wait, she can't come back
Howie: Michael didn't have a chance so send him back for Janey's romance
Janelle: That's too many words
Howie: Are you going somewhere??
Beau: That bug's back, the locust kinda thing, the one that has landing gear?
Jennifer: That's Dan
Beau: Oh, we call him Dan?
Howie (on tv): They show people throwing up on tv all the time, people getting their heads cut off, but show one half of a little boobie and everyone freaks out
Howie: They're going to hire James.. he'll be their veto competition trainer
As usual, some are happy and fun.. some are not
Some are definitely not happy
When they start modeling the finished products, well, it isn't fashion week in Paris
April: What would happen if I just eat anyway, just a penalty nomination?
James: You'd still beat me on Thursday
April: I know!
Sarah: As much as everybody hates us in here, I'm sure the rest of the outside world is thinking 'wow they're being so mean to them and they did nothing wrong'
Janelle: He was always farting and burping, nobody wants to see that
Sarah: Did you bring your shirt to DR?
James: Yea.. you have to admit I'm a good sport
Howie: I can't believe it's been five weeks now we've been in here, can you believe that?
April: Fuck yea! I believe it
(April starts telling her story to Jennifer again, by now it's all about evil Ivette)
Jennifer: I know! I've heard this story like 20 times today.. you shouldn't have told her all that in the first place!
Sarah finally finishes her shirt: GO GET 'EM BABY! Sarah and James - apparently she didn't understand the assignment - Ivette goes in for a meeting about evictions and futures, I don't know, it's all BS on both sides as usual, super cheap insurance policies that won't pay off when needed.. Sarah keeps interrupting "what about me?" shouting & crying - James keeps telling her to shut up
You've got to be kidding
I don't know what most of this is about
The night just gets weird, but Jennifer's everywhere
Jenn whispers in a major way to Janelle who whispers to Howie who whispers back.. elsewhere, Maggie's getting cozy with Ivette
It gets weirder: April & Jennifer are playing chess, very late (weird enough, I know).. Howie & Janelle join them and April starts retelling her sorry tales yet again.. they do another analysis of the Michael Harasser situation - Jenn says Eric blew it out of proportion that night she was crying and that's the extent of her involvement
Howie finally spots an opening and takes over the convo, turning it to raunchy nasty sex, like he does sometimes.. we revisit Jenn's absent boyfriend & his likes, and find out she did a few fraternity boys (oral only she says, since she was a virgin).. April likes it doggy-style (close to that anal curious thing she's got, remember? which Mr. April isn't into)
If you're thinking whoa, way too much info! you're right.. but understand this convo went for at least an hour, going into areas of depravity you probably don't want to hear about.. but they put it all out there, so I have to at least bring you the gist of it.. don't blame the messenger :)
Howie goes on to his usual press of questions about experiences, fantasies, masturbation, etc.. Jenn & April respond to many of them but Janelle doesn't.. she seems very uncomfortable but he goes on questioning her, making her & viewers a bit squirrely.. she doesn't say "stop it Howie" or "I'm not going to answer that" - she just sits there and he keeps asking.. neither Jenn nor April say anything either.. it's no fun at all and Howie obviously has no concept of where the line is, and he's also gone five weeks now and makes no secret of how horny he's getting lately
Maggie wakes up at this point and realizes April & Jennifer are up too late talking with Howie & Janelle.. she isn't far away but they aren't being real loud.. nobody knows if she hears what they're saying or not, but she goes back to sleep.. big mistake
Fortunately the convo shifts back to April & Jennifer, who start another tirade and feedsters start to check out.. then they start saying why don't they send Ivette out the back door Thursday? This surprises Howie & Janelle but April & Jenn have obviously worked on this one and they have all the angles covered
They take it upstairs where they hash out the what-ifs and the details.. with Rachel or James they are enough votes without having to tell anyone else.. Jennifer starts picking/grooming Howie and before long she's under the covers of his bed as they talk.. Howie & Janelle are sounding interested - they come close to firming it up but stop short when April says "I should probably run this by Maggie first"
Janelle takes her place in Howie's bed and Jennifer gets the hint - the whole tone has changed anyway - they separate to upstairs/downstairs bathrooms where Jennifer tells April that Howie & Janelle got on board too fast, it must be a trap to get rid of them.. Howie & Janelle wonder WTF that was all about but they're clearly thinking how nice it would be with Ivette gone and wondering if it could be this easy - the previous tension between them, on Janelle's side at least, is long gone
April hates James cuz he told her once she's insecure and another time said she talks too much - both true - now he's nominated but not for long so she's stuck with him at least another week and she's afraid of him
April was potentially nominated for a couple of hours and freaked out, dragging everyone into it and blaming everything but what it was about: fear of eviction (being disliked)
Tension's been building between April & Ivette but April now hates her because she volunteered to take April's place without freaking out about it, so she must be punished
This is highly simplified - there are a lot of additional details & factors but I think it pretty much boils down to this.. remember April and to a lesser extent Jennifer were the ones who carried all of James' lies back & forth, and are largely responsible for him & Sarah going up this week in the first place
April's been driving the house for a couple weeks and she's the most destructive force in there next to James.. she says she hates liars but she lies all the time; she says she hates trash talk but she can't mention anyone without trashing them.. she says she's about strategy and 'nothing personal' but she's all about personal - scared to death of not being liked, eager to punish those who dislike her, and enlisting other people to do it for her.. just my opinion
I'll leave Jennifer for another time, except to say I don't think she's under the radar at all: Beau's under the radar and Howie before this week; Jennifer's very busy and merely overlooked
|Inked: Best of Season 1|
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