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Never put it on or near a television, radio or hi-fi or a fridge."
|7/26/05 - Day 24
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Prude Jude speaks
The story behind Michael's blog - HamsterWatch exclusive
..eat your heart out, secret-leak syndicate sites
Yes or no, was the Michael blog real or not?
It was real in that it actually existed on the interwebs. It was fake in that it was not Michael Donnellan posting from inside the BB6 house. So I guess the answer is 'no'. I officially apologize to all 7 people who care.
So who are you?
Green Lantern or the Flash, but not Aquaman.
And you don't work for CBS or SGP or anything? What's your real job?
Honestly, I'm just a Big Brother fan like anyone else. I saw that I was going to have a bunch of free time this summer, and decided to get hard-core this year; get the feeds and everything. I'm a professional screenwriter by trade. I write porno movies.
Why the blog?
I always have a lot of opinions on the show and thought I would give them an outlet. A blog seemed to make sense. I really felt I'd reached a point in my life where the world was ready to hear what I have to say about Big Brother. Last year would have been too soon.
Obviously I wanted people to read it, so I figured I needed a hook. At first I thought I would do like a blatantly fake one with a houseguest, like a 'Michael's Subconscious Thoughts' or something, but then I thought, 'why not a real fake one?' There was really no way someone could prove Michael wasn't doing it, y'know? If I was careful and paid attention to details, I thought I could pull it off. I've averaged about 10-12K hits a day, so I guess I did all right.
Why did you pick Michael Donnellan?
When they released the HG info, I tried to find the one who would be likely to stay in the longest and also who was closest in age/demo to me, so that it sounded genuine. Michael was the best looking dude and we're the same age, so he stuck out right away. Then I found his website and saw all the things he's done and that he was educated – he was really perfect. I honestly thought he'd win. I had a Howie blog in the beginning (just in case) but then the Michael one was found earlier than I wanted and I had to go with it.
I look more like Michael but act more like Howie in real life. If they had a child it would be me, except not like a full grown adult already, because humans have to start as babies and then grow to full size. Maybe I should have tried to do both blogs. Little did I know Michael had no clue he was on BB6 or how to play. I think he thought he was on vacation. He's a fascinating person, though, y'know?
How did you get everything so accurate?
A lot of it was really calculated, and I'm sure some people will think I'm crazy for going to such lengths. I guess I'm kind of obsessive about doing something right if I'm going to do it. This is where I need to hold back some info, but I can tell you I've been in the house. About 5 or 6 times. I was also in the sequesteration hotel once. I've seen what goes on behind the scenes and was able to observe Michael before the show started – that's why I knew things like him being a little ADD, referring to himself as a 'scumbag', and subtle things like that. People picked up a lot of cues in the blog, but there is a lot more people didn't. I did my research.
(btw when that newspaper article used the word sequesteration as if it were a real word I was dying lol)
Anyway, the other part was pure luck. Like, I had that post about taking a table apart, and then that night (1st night of the feeds, I think) he tries to take a table apart. I was like 'well, that was odd. And exciting!'
Shaving the goatee? From what I've been able to find out, I'm 95% sure they told him to do that, which means they were playing along with me. Honestly, I was shocked we didn't get a 'Prude Jude' on the live show that week. Maybe that would have been too clear of a 'shout out', but I thought he'd say it.
He might have if he'd gotten any screentime that night. Is the blog going to continue with Michael evicted?
Yes, absolutely, although it's going to be reinvented to some extent. I was thinking of continuing the ruse, but then realized having Michael blog from [edited] would be really boring, plus I can't get to where he is right now to even see if he's in a hotel or house or what. With no details, when he returns to BB, he could easily negate anything I wrote pretty quickly. Plus, if he's not the one who comes back, it's a wash, anyway, AND the real reason for the blog is to comment on the show, not to live the fictional life of Michael Donnellan.
I'm happy to be continuing. Honestly, reinventing the blog will really let me cut loose on these people. I'm still watching the show and feeds, after all. Michael had become my de facto favorite (rooting interest and all), but I'm a Big Brother fan first. I'm just happy people read the thing and liked it.
Wait, so someone is coming back?
Allegedly, yeah. That's all I know about that, and most people have speculated it already anyway. I'm not sure how, considering Julie Chen has so smoothly held it back in post eviction interviews. Is 'smoothly' the right word? What's another word for 'catastophic train wreck'?
What were the clues all about? Did you have an answer of how Michael would allegedly be doing this?
No, those were just for fun. It was funny to watch people try to put it together, because the clues intentionally made no sense whatsoever. There was actually a lot of thought put into making sure they made no sense, so that's kind of weird, huh? The next one was going to be a picture of Carl Lewis holding up a gold medal from the 1984 Olympics, and the one after that was a crayon drawing of Alf.
So, just to be clear, you don't work for CBS or anything? Do you have contacts there?
'Contacts' would be a loose word. I'm not friends with anyone over there – I'm just like the type of person who can walk into the Oval Office and convince everyone I'm supposed to be there. I sat in on a production meeting with the higher-ups of the show one day. Seriously, there were only like 10 or 12 people in there. I'm sitting here laughing as I type this, but I walked in with a laptop and a bunch of notebooks and stuff, grabbed some coffee and sat in on a meeting. lol
I don't work for the show or CBS. If I did their ratings would be a lot higher. They could fix this show so easily. They frustrate me because I truly believe they could be doing 'American Idol' or 'Survivor' numbers.
It's funny, though – I've actually been contacted by three other television producers and a couple of those snarky blog sites about work. It's very funny to have concrete things develop from what I see as just a bunch of stupid crap I made up for fun.
I'd be happy to take any offers for snarky work that you don't want off your hands. Has BB been in contact with you? Did they try to find you?
I think they did try to find me or at least track me down. I was pretty careful with masking my ip and stuff. Like I said, though, I've been in there which I think is just hilarious. I might go back one day for fun. From what I could gather, they were trying to figure out if it was an inside job at first. There really are like 300 people who work over there, so it wasn't unfathomable that someone in there could be doing it. It's not at all organized.
I think once they saw that I wasn't doing any damage to the show, they were probably cool with it. That newspaper article on the blog certainly didn't hurt, and I was careful not to put any of those google ad things on the side, so that they knew I wasn't capitalizing or trying to profit from their show. Not to brag, but any one post on my blog was roughly 80,000 times better than the bland-blogs they have on the CBS site. I understand it's because they're on the CBS homepage, but why do they have to be? Use the internet, y'know?
Interesting side note – I've tracked the ratings with the hits the blog gets. It's not conclusive, but I think Michael was pretty popular. Admittedly, I know little about this. Just that when blog hits were up, ratings were. Like I said, I was getting like 10-12K per day, which amazes me. It's obviously been less nice he got the boot, but it's holding steady. Of course, I haven't really been posting since he got evicted, so hopefully it goes back up when I get going again.
Anything else you want to say?
I have a bunch of fanmail for Michael when he gets out. It was actually really touching what some people wrote in as he was getting slaughtered. I almost felt bad for being a really big liar. I will get those to him, though, for those of you that wrote in. A few of his relatives have actually emailed asking if the blog was really him, so I may do a few interviews or something, also. Other than that, I don't like Eric or Ivette. I'm excited for the NFL.
Thanks for doing this interview, fake Michael Donnellan blogger.
Thank you. I love your site and read it every day. The Michael Blog gets 'relaunched' later this week! I have a lot more to say.
Thanks very much. We'll be watching for its return, and thanks for taking the time to make it all more fun.
Back to our story
Kaysar's meat was an issue today - it was left out of the fridge overnight.. who did that?! Turned out he probably did in a late night prowl
More of the same.. lots of fishies today
Late night is still the best.. Sarah & James did the deed, or some deed - it was done by the time my Real logo stopped spinning but Aldav says it happened and he wouldn't lie about these things.. Beau gazed at Howie in the bathroom for what seemed an eternity.. Kaysar gazed at (and lovingly interrogated) Janelle for an eternity in the backyard
Enough wordage for one day.. here are some free random pics
Beau: What would you & Rachel talk about?
Howie: All kinds of things.. horses
Beau: You know about horses?
Howie: Sure, they got the ones with the wings, and the ones with the white horn, and the ones with the feet
There's a new Night Prowler in the house, and he's doing a 5am arts & crafts project
The Complete First Season
Lots of extras
I don't care who wins, I'm just here for the cheap entertainment - the cheaper, the better
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