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|8/25/05 - Day 54
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>> Rachel evicted 5-0 - April is Head of Household <<
Bye bye Ray Ray
It's another Thursday primp-a-thon and Rachel & Howie spend some final quality time together
Both are prepared to go and both are expecting it'll be Rachel, but you never can tell with hamsters
Beau does the ironing as usual and stresses about his upcoming Julie Q&A.. Howie stretches, or something.. Janelle & Ivette are a vision of light & dark as they chat friendly over hair.. Janelle puts on the green dress that Ivette was dissing last night
Nurse and health nut Maggie licks her eyeliner before applying, then has a heads-down private chat with April before helping Rachel with her hair.. it's looking like she's currying favor for later this evening, but it turns out she's planting sequester seeds as Rachel's the one who jets off to paradise tonight
Maggie: It's fucked up how you have to lie in this game.. from now on I'm not ever giving my word again
Maggie: I haven't seen anyone play dirtier than him (James)
Rachel has a nice sendoff (which she deserved) other than the hateful farewell from Ivette (which she didn't).. there's no reason CBS needed to add that to a live show for Rachel to wonder about in front of us all - they've skipped plenty of farewells til now - better they would have aired some of Ivette's hateful rant the other night if they wanted to show Ivette in a bad light, but that doesn't seem to be the agenda at CBS these days.. it's 2005, the year of the Bad Evil Jedi in Studio City
Ivette: Your behavior in this house is out of control.. you have left me speechless with my mouth dropped.. I've never seen such poor sportmanship like that carried by yourself
audio by Aldav
Get a grip, Hamsterwatchers! If you aren't a second cousin or better, the winner really shouldn't have any effect on you.. take it for the entertainment it is and if you can't find any, shut it off.. I'll be tempted to do that soon, but I'm having serious problems with the portrayal of who's who in the habitat on the tv version
Your new head of household
I said it would be entertaining watching her crumble under the pressure.. I certainly never expected it to happen and I sure don't want it, but here we are
It's the "I Dream of April" show.. heaven help us
April wastes no time making a beeline to the pimp room to lay out her plan to Howie & Janelle, with Maggie close behind to endorse it and point her finger.. I think it's only the second time Maggie's been in the pimp room - the first was to ask Kaysar to take care of the fighting on drunk tank night
The plan is simple and a tired rerun by now: April will nominate the "Sovereign Two" as CBS lamely coined them (here they're known as the Stars Of The Show).. this won't raise any suspicions with anyone, and when the veto's won by anyone but James, they'll remove Janelle, April will put up James and they'll get rid of him once and for all
Everyone admits what everyone knows anyway, that James has been promising both sides he's with them.. April says she'll take care of Ivette so she won't use the veto on James if she wins it (it's Anything Can Happen Week after all) and tells Howie & Janelle not to tell him anything
Janelle & Howie seem safe for the week, but lost for the game.. they're bummed and don't have much to console each other with.. she leaves and Howie rolls over with a "shoulda"
Janelle: I feel this is my week to leave, I have a very bad feeling
Janelle: I was this close to being first two-time HOH.. I'm gonna start eating now
Howie: I shoulda jerked off.. FUCK!
James doesn't need be told anything - he's been here before, he gets it.. April & Maggie have a meeting in the pantry, which has been fully stocked.. Beau grills dinner without incident and they all eat together without incident
April: What if the veto's not won?
Maggie: Then it's their own fault
April: I'll tell them that Jennifer brought me here and she had a plan, I'm just following it through
Maggie: Oh my god you're going to be the one to get him out! I tried, Howie tried
Maggie: What are you going to tell Beau & Ivette?
April: They're together, but they're separate
Maggie: For me, they're both in the Friendship
There are strange, awkward convo groupings all over: Ivette, Howie & Janelle.. Maggie & James.. HOH room debut can't come soon enough
Unlike that other time, everyone shows up and it's the usual assortment of smiles & tears & squeals
She gets Dave Matthews, pics of Matt & Pepperoni of course, a bathrobe (like Janelle's) and Uggs (like Janelle's)
Everyone piles on top of Howie, like they do, and James checks for our reaction not once, not twice, but three times! He's especially surprised by the "reverse cowgirl" suggested by and co-demonstrated by Beau
I'm starting to think our boy James may have watched the feeds before
Howie arrives for the first meeting which is a rerun of the earlier meeting, and goes on forever - you know April
Janelle joins and they compare bathrobes.. the meeting continues well into the night with endless repetition
April: You & Janelle will go up - it's not personal, we don't want you to go, we just want James out
April: Do not let him play for veto for you
April: Kaysar's name never came up until after the power of veto, trust me
Beau & friends finally show up to break up the party and start a new one.. it's a chenille* love fest for a minute, then Beau gooses Howie out the door
* At $100+ a pop, I don't think these robes are your regular run-of-the-mill terrycloth
Let the cheap shots begin
The rest of the night defies all logic and explanation
In short: April, Maggie & Ivette are so incapable of telling the truth they spend hours coming up with lies for James so he doesn't suspect he's being backdoor'd (even though he already knows he is, and telling him the truth wouldn't hurt anyone)
Sub-plots include April & Maggie trying to prevent Ivette from either telling James or rescuing him; Ivette trying to get them to focus on Janelle instead; April telling Maggie that Ivette & Beau will try to make them step down so they can go for the big money; Maggie trying to keep with everything; Ivette subtly sniping at all of them; and all of them hating everyone else.. I only wish I was exaggerating
It starts with a bracelet Matt sent to April that she's thrilled with.. she tries it on her ankle but it won't fit, so Beau helps her size it for her wrist
April: Matt's such a great shopper
April: Matt's had this forever
Ivette: So it's something that he's had forever, isn't that sweet?
April: I think he's had it since high school
Ivette: So it's all used up? That's great
April goes downstairs to hang out with Janelle some more and discuss bathrobes.. Maggie & Ivette carry on without her
Maggie: Janelle has the balls to say that I had a conversation with her?
Ivette: This is the thing, I know this is a game but April has contradicted a lot
April's delayed further by a show 'n tell in Diary.. she returns full of tell-all joy but it quickly dissipates.. even self-centered April can sense the tone in here isn't friendly
Ivette: Janelle is so evil, she spins everything
Maggie: James is way better at manipulating than Janelle!
Ivette: I guess so
Maggie: So you think it's better to get Janelle out now and not have the option to backdoor James at all?
(Ivette says nothing)
Beau: He's gonna do what it takes
It goes on & on, the more they talk the more they spin everything.. it's truly mind-boggling and almost fascinating in a sick, morbid car-crash kinda way
April: Jennifer said to take Rachel, then James, then Janelle, then Howie*
April: Who do you think should go Beau?
Beau: I think James has to go this week.. would we take off Howie?
April: No, Janelle
April: Janelle will dig herself a hole, every time she lies I can read it
Maggie: She doesn't say much to me, anytime she says anything to me it's offensive
Ivette: So it's a 50/50 win, if nobody gets it Janelle goes, if somebody gets it James goes
Maggie: I wanted the HOH to say it
April: Rachel told me today 'I know that I'm leaving' I said 'how do you know?' She said 'James told me'
Maggie (to Ivette): Can't you NOT tell him about it? Say 'it's none of your fucking business'
* nuh uh, behind the sofa Jennifer & April decided to go for Maggie & Ivette
They go into a lengthy discussion that puts Ivette on the spot as far as her loyalty to James.. she says she doesn't want to lie to him and they decide, at Maggie's suggestion, that a lie of omission isn't really a lie at all (tell it to Michael)
see the video
For what it's worth, and I hate to say it, but I think Ivette is the only one of them showing some ethics here.. I think it's true that she hasn't lied as much as the others anyway, and she doesn't want to lie to her other partner James - that's understandable and in a way, commendable.. it'd be easier to swallow if she wasn't so big on diverting attention off herself by spewing hate & nasties about anyone who's handy, but there you are.. that's Ivette for you
Maggie (the "brains" of the group) tries to wrap her head around the seven remaining hamsters and their four votes next week - I kid you not
For some reason, Beau takes this moment to show how he folds a shirt.. he gets his head bitten off by April who in turn is put in her place by Ivette
April (to Beau): You wanna know why you can't win HOH? Cuz you're fucking more worried about how you're gonna fold your clothes when you get inside!
Beau: Wha? chhhhh
Ivette: Cute,but let me just fix it real quick
They go down to make some food at 1am even though they bitch about Howie & Janelle eating so late when they watch them on the spyscreen.. Howie & Janelle come in from outside and join them.. Howie livens things up a bit, being Howie
Maggie: Beau, you are not HOH anymore, stop being a diva
The get-along ends as soon as they separate, as usual.. April tells Maggie she thinks they'll be expected to give up soon so that Ivette & Beau can get the big money - Maggie's surprised & skeptical.. Beau reads the Bible to them about righteous people versus those with slanderous tongues.. Maggie & April each pat themselves on the back
Downstairs it's a different story as Janelle "undoes" her last bit of live show prep.. in spite of 4 hours of dancing around what to tell James, he knows he's done.. he & Janelle & Howie bed down in the cot room
Maggie: We are still the Friendship even though we are now four
Beau: It didn't really start til we were five
Maggie: But Eric was part of it
Maggie: It didn't really start until I was HOH
April: The 'weakest' (finger quotes) took out the 'strongest' (finger quotes)
Janelle: I look like hell! I have bandaids on my nipples! Oww!
James: It's Alfalfa versus Mike Tyson now
Janelle's bandaids cap by Amy's Bus Ticket - you don't suppose that's what her argument with Arnie was about?? I hope not.. it would explain a lot though
What a night
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