Dingo's Hamster Watch - Big Brother 5

"Position the habitat of your hamster somewhere light and airy,
away from drafts, heaters, direct sunlight and other pets.
Never put it on or near a television, radio or hi-fi or a fridge."

This site isn't about who should win, who will win, who I'd be friends with, or who is cute. It's about watching hamsters: which ones are doing what and why. Which are fun and which are dull. If they aren't entertaining, get rid of 'em! More to come, bookmark & come back! .. that dingo

Linkage

Daily feed recaps & opinion ratings navigation tool for this often-biased site
HamsterWatch Big Brother 8 here we go again
HamsterWatch Big Brother 7 Hamster all-stars in the house
HamsterWatch Big Brother 6 time to do it all over again
CBS Big Brother 5 the official site
Housecalls live web show with Marcellas, also archived shows
TV Updates feed updates, screencaps, and fun boards - easy to use and functional!
bb5fan's 30 second refresh screencaps if you don't have feeds (great at work!)
Hollyisms and Cowboyisms and Lisa-isms from me, that dingo person
Sir LinksALot Big Brother 5 all the links
Reality TV Links emphasis on individual hamsters' sites
Aldav has all of the edgier stuff & the best mini-recaps in town (alternate url)
Today's must-click special: Grin's BB5 Park: Day 60 from Jokers
Bonus must-click special: Smart dog video makes hamsters look really dumb - from Squizzle

8/30/04 - Day 60, part 1 >> to the future >> dwell in the past >> latest
>> power-up - go to part 2

Drew's making dinner

It dawns on them that it's high time Drew
start pitching in around the house

HamsterWatch episodes have been
getting carried away lately
"simplify.. simplify.."

Karen doesn't think she spoke well at the veto thingy, but apparently she made her point ok - Adria's now working her for a vote

Adria: I pray for these people every day, and I'm glad that I do, cuz they need it

They're all bored and miserable.. little worries gnaw at them:
Marvin & Cowboy don't understand why they can't play Yoplait anymore..
word on the street is that Cowboy's been hiding a letter - but even stranger, they're calling him CB now - just like the internet fans! hmmm..

Cowboy goes down for his nap.. (Natalie's bed is still prepared & waiting for her)
He decides to make it a "special" nap - off go the shorts!

He starts to get down to business.. and then he hears the camera

Everyone prepares themselves something different for lunch.. healthy & tasty

Drew's hungry but nobody made him lunch.. so he makes his own
He puts his new onion-cutting skills to use (after asking which direction to slice)
and opts for the fancy Watch-Your-Fingers method

He grabs some chips, warms up the skillet, and.. "Attention houseguests - this is a lockdown".. he cusses the timing, but obeys - grabbing more chips on his way out..
Lockdown over, he fries up the meat and dishes it out.. by knife-tip <scrape scrape>

Spread some mayo, lick the knife, grab a chip.. hmm missing something.. lettuce!

Another chip or two.. oops, dropped one! He parks his full plate 2/3 extended over the table edge, narrowly avoiding disaster - and finally takes his meal outside to dig in

"Check it out, look at this fine lunch I made!" He gloats so much over his accomplishment that they all decide he should make dinner for everyone tonight

Karen bakes.. Diane bastes.. Marvin applies mint-chip licious to a booty..
Drew shoves Nat's outfit aside <gasp> lays down and stares at the ceiling
(Drew was up late.. doing himself.. but Diane kept him company.. yep, just company)

Diane gives Marvin a new buzz and touch-up paint.. they have a friendly chat about non-game stuff.. Diane's so relaxed a little Kentucky drawl even slips out - it's nice..
They chat about makeup, making up corpses at Marvin's mortuary, lots of things..

Diane: I've never seen a dead person with good makeup

Another lockdown: Cowboy plays solitaire.. Drew thinks long and hard about Karen's cookies and joins him.. asks if Cowboy can play euchre..

Drew: Hey these are good!
Big Brother: Attention houseguests, please go to the backyard

Electric hamsters

Big Brother's given them a new toy

They read the directions:
Grab a handle, start it up, push the button
when it lights up.. sounds simple enough..

An obnoxious loud siren starts to wail..

ZAP! Diane screams and jumps away "It shocked me!!" It must be broken

They try again.. Karen gets zapped..
Diane says "I'm not touching that thing again! Is this legal??"

Marvin gets zapped.. Diane gets zapped again..

Everyone gets zapped.. they go back inside

I'm pretty sure most hamster care manuals don't recommend electrocution

Filthy euchre

Drew starts teaching Nik & Cowboy how to play and explains the important terminology
Diane's happy - she loves euchre! She always wins, especially when she's drunk!
Nik & Cowboy follow along, asking questions as they go

Diane: This'll be hella fun if you guys can learn it.. which I doubt
Cowboy: Why do you say that?
Diane: Because it's very very complicating.. I mean, well Nakomis picks up everything right away
(silence)
Diane: I didn't mean it like that!
Cowboy: I took it like that

Drew explains more about how to play for awhile..
Diane: Cowboy, I'm really sorry, I can tell you're completely offended right now
Cowboy: It's all right.. actually I think I've played this before
Diane: I'm learning stuff now, and I've been playing this for years.. I feel really bad now
....
(Nik & Cowboy are doing better than Diane, who keeps getting confused by the rules)
Diane: I really have no idea what I'm doing.. I always win this game and my friends don't understand why.. I'm so retarded

The game moves outside and they all have a good time.. hey, Drew's happy too

They break, and Nik starts teaching Karen how to play
Drew & Diane do their usual tease 'n kiss a bit, dissing Marvin - Diane tells Drew some stuff about him harassing her that isn't true

Diane: Fuck off
Drew: YOU fuck off
Diane: You got yours last night
....
Diane: Nakomis is out there trying to teach Karen euchre, and she just doesn't get it
(it turned out later Nik didn't know all the rules yet)
Drew: It isn't easy to teach, as you saw
Cowboy: She's a sport
Diane: Who?
Cowboy: Both of 'em.. it's pretty cool she's trying to teach her when she just learned it
(silence)

hell yea, there's a part 2 for this one - plug in

In a surprising change of strategy, Adria only spoke a few words today - but she made each one count. She watched and waited for her opening, without rushing it, and her patience paid off. With just a few well-chosen words to Diane (and Drew), she scored a direct hit and upped the ante to a new level of psychological warfare we haven't seen before. And why not? She's got nothing to lose at this point. They've got nothing to lose by acknowledging she's alive either.. but hey, 'nothing personal' right?

Cowboy showed some class today (not counting his 'special' nap) by overlooking a nasty personal insult from Diane, and also for letting Drew take credit for work that Cowboy did. Add to that he's stirred up things in a serious way on the Drew/Diane front (which affects everyone at this point).. he likely didn't mean to, but it still counts.

Another meltdown, and none too soon. Diane outdid herself today, taking the trash talk out from behind Adria's and Cowboy's backs and putting it in their faces. To her credit, she felt bad about insulting Cowboy (or so she said) but Adria is just this week's Holly: Diane doesn't function at her best without an antagonist, preferably female, to feel superior to (who's next?) Adria took it to a new level by hitting Diane where it hurts: in her fairytale dream of happy-ever-after with Drew.. I said yesterday I thought that was her vulnerable point, and tonight it indeed looks to be the case. All good and well as hamsters go, worthy of double ups even, but the emotional damage we've been seeing peeks of showed up strong today, and that isn't fun.. she's got a free pass to neutral.

He's fun to watch stumble through ordinary tasks as ineptly as he does, but that's just window dressing.. let's take inventory: The guy had a job to do, let Cowboy do it for him, took the credit himself and didn't even say thanks. Last night he jerks off while Diane kisses & cuddles him for moral support, then rolls over and goes to sleep, talks shit about her all day - and on top of all that he's still hiding out in her pocket while she plays the game for him! All this knowing full well she's falling hard for him, and brushing that aside. But she's getting a little payment at least - she's spinning stories to him while he's yanking and letting him spread them around for her. The toppers: he played hardball about the girls paying off a drunken card bet with nekkidness, and complained to Marvin about being horny and not getting any. After whining all over town about Marvin being sex-obsessed. What an ass.

They're all about 'taking one for the team' and 'nothing personal' but Karen really did take one for them all by being the only one who'd hang with Adria. Winning the veto only intensified the time investment there - and likely dispersed some post-Twingate fallout - but all Karen's going to get for it is a nomination. Emotional basketcase or just playing one on tv? It doesn't matter.. Karen's out-classing all of them on a daily basis.

Marvin laid low today, and it wasn't accidental. He saw the Adria/Diane showdown coming, and he stepped aside and let it happen. He didn't instigate and he didn't prevent, and he still provided comic relief to break the tension at just the right moments. As much as he likes to needle Diane for reaction (she loves it too - don't kid yourself) he handled her sudden drops into seriously painful depths with class and concern, and eased everyone through the awkward moments in a way only Marvin can. He's gotta get in there and smooth his way out of a nomination though, or we'll all be bored to death for the next few weeks.

Nik instigated a whole lot of today's stuff, and it didn't seem like she did it in good spirits. She knows she and Diane aren't going to be best friends after this, and she knows the day's coming soon when they'll have to turn on each other. Maybe she thinks Diane 'won' today's battle with Adria - why else would she keep egging her on? Karen said 'you're like the mean kid in school' - maybe she's just enjoying not being on the receiving end of that.

Reduced to a single but still negative for no show on Saturday - boo!! It didn't help that all hamsters were tucked in by midnight that night either - which isn't CBS's fault - but it made for a double whammy nobody needed on a Saturday night.